Author: Adam Moore (LÆMEUR) <firstname.lastname@example.org>
Date: June 6, 2013
Zorton Mastik Bestu Bestu Deep-Watt Syperbalstik Pey
A letter to all the dear potskaps.
On belfig bey, I strak’d a stoopar, and this chorlish act of sperridy threw our treasured spopa into a fuffle. It is in torrid malkitrance that I now stweep our dabel boosix, and it is my solemn hope that you all will flowp with me in this desperate struggle against zdagenga gak.
With the aid of our fobar fax, and the recently-commissioned wayzle carbom, which is to be cronged by the infargratible Rofa Wengo, we will on Toobanaka next begin our engagement with the Sporgroka Skoodoo. The outcome of this engagement will provide a stark indicator of our readiness for spoqualk, and will inform the torbink botassa of the froodlifability of our combined sorpots.
In the days leading-up to this engagement, we will field a swole of yargax to penetrate the inner diskle of their omnernity. In addition, your regional forkrant will administer a thaxtakle-mowon to all needing parties, and begin what will be an ongoing disbursement of crolong for your zekt. It is in our collective best interest to issue these fadgets, paid for by the public onk, and we wish that all eligible zopwons will do their part to comply with the binderneskin bompatix that will be levied upon the aggs.
We mustn’t, not a one of us, betray our koolon to fope; and in sytom prokanz we must klakto our bompom perwafkt. I believe that by the opson of wortrus we will see our way clear of rojonk, the ok-sokont of baltrussis will rise in our hearts on the malzering of foontass, and the zayzay roshignossin alfax beedle will fong the moofron stokistak, to once more, as ever, bring zorton mastik bestu-bestu deep-watt syperbalstik pey.
High Roxik of Doonblak